Sunday, July 8, 2012

What We Learned On Our Family Vacation.

1. When, as you are getting ready to leave on your vacation, the hairdryer blows itself off the counter and lands on the EXACT spot on your foot that you injured (perhaps even broke) a couple weeks earlier, STOP. RIGHT. THERE. DO NOT go on this trip. This is a sign. You will give that a fleeting thought and then, once the immense pain subsides, you will brush this feeling off and continue with your plans. THIS is the wrong move. Even though you will be able to walk around Cedar Point without trouble, you will soon realize that your injury is merely the tip of the iceberg.

2. When you are less than an hour away from your home and the "Check Transmission" light pops on...CHECK THE TRANSMISSION!!!!!!! If you don't, your van will run until you are about 30 minutes away from your destination and then it will break down.

3. The Lord will take care of you. You will break down in a Monroe Muffler parking lot.

4. An incredibly helpful man named Al Cappone will help you as speedily as he can, but your 3 hour trip will now take you 5.

5. When budgeting for your vacation, always make sure to include the cost of a rental car at around $84 a day, as well as the cost of a brand new transmission. Because everyone needs one of those souvenier transmissions.

6. When you (FINALLY) arrive at your hotel, you will be told that despite the fact that you were previously given the OK to have three cribs in your room, it is actually against the fire code.

7. You will then argue your way up the chain of command until you are told that, oops! They made a mistake. You ARE allowed to have three cribs. Here's 10% off your room for the trouble.

8. If you are traveling with the Bowmans in the future, there will be AT LEAST 2 suites. Probably 3. Otherwise, no one sleeps...ever.

9. 100 degrees is too hot to do Cedar Point. So after a few kiddie rides you will head over to Soak City.

10. In 100 degree heat, even the water at Soak City isn't THAT refreshing...but you can still have fun.

11.  If you are vacationing at Cedar Point (and especially if you are staying at the Hotel Breakers), you will eat at Fridays and Perkins about 50 times.

12. Cedar Point is NOT baby friendly, and BARELY little kid friendly. It is also not age 30 and above friendly. :/

13. On the second day of your vacation, your husband will wake up feeling horrible. No, he's not still tired from a bad night's sleep. He is sick. Nauseated, congested, fever of 101 degrees sick.

14. He will take some meds and troop through a morning of a few more kiddie rides and the pool. But at lunch he will crash, and by early afternoon, you are packing up, checking out, and going home...a day early.

15. After all of this, your two oldest children will turn into Chuckie, and the Bride of Chuckie for the ride home.

16. When you ask them their favorite part of the trip they will tell you it was the suckers they got at the gift shop. (And the Peanuts cars they rode in kiddie land...but that takes away from the feel of this post.)

17. Also on the ride home, one of your babies will throw up all over himself. Poor Lukie. And that, among a million other things like potty breaks, dinner, pulling over to deal with the children, and pulling over to nurse the children, will turn your "3 hour trip" into 5.

18. It is NOT a stupid idea to leave the A/C on in your house while you are gone. Otherwise, you will end up calling your friends to break in to turn it on for you because you are coming home unexpectedly on a 102 degree day.

19. Yes. It will be worth it.
20. Oh! And smile! You get to drive all the way back to pick up your van in a few days!


Tonya Winebrenner said...

Ohhhh buddy!!! Wow, you guys sure know how to have a good time ;-) glad you're all safe and the kids enjoyed their suckers, lol.

Abby Bowman said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Breezi@ Not Your Average Fairytale said...

ohh no! Your new van needs a new transmission?! So sorry! That stinks.

At least you had a memorable trip, right? ;D


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